Agony and Ecstasy
Each poem that I write
Is forced from me
By agony or ecstasy!.
Not day nor night
Makes any difference
To tortured sense;
For, when compulsion comes to me,
I cannot fight
The agony, the ecstasy!.
Who’s no true poet may
Not pay this fee
To agony or ecstasy;
Nor can se say
Why someone, like myself,
Should burn hez health
In flames which no-one else might see,
In thrall each day
To agony, to ecstasy!.
It cannot be explained
Rationally,
This agony; this ecstasy;
Nor how I’m chained
By my unchosen choice
To be the voice
Of dumb perceptibility:
My feelings pained
By agony!. By ecstasy!.
Once Beauty caught my eye
And blinded me
To agony and ecstasy,
I did not spy
Where my rapt mind was led;
For in my head
Were only dreams of poetry:
Not I might die
In agony!. In ecstasy!.
I was seduced by charms
Of potency
To agony, to ecstasy!.
I saw no harms
In rhymes’ or rhythms’ beat,
Or metres’ feet,
Until it was too late for me
To fly the arms
Of Agony!. Of Ecstasy!.
Their dungeon-cell shut fast,
(Enclosing me
With Agony!. With Ecstasy!),
Before, aghast!,
I woke. I beat that door
Till I no more
Had strength nor rebel energy;
Then turned, at last,
To Agony!. To Ecstasy!.
Each poem that I write
Is burned from me
In agony or ecstasy.
Yet, if I might
Escape their searing coals,
My anguished soul’s
Ardour for martyrdom would be
Too strong for flight
From Agony or Ecstasy!.
For now I cannot live
Objectively,
(Such agony!; such ecstasy!),
But I must give
My senses to their flames
And call their names
To purge plain words to poetry
Through the hot sieve
Of agony or ecstasy!.
Artists might understand
My Purgatory
Of agony and ecstasy;
And how my hand,
Against my own desires,
Enters those fires
In willing, hurt reluctancy,
To grasp the brand
Of angony!. Of ecstasy!.
Therefore I suffer here
The penalty
Of agony’s pure ecstasy,
To earn a clear
Sight through candescent flame.
I’ve learned to tame
Passions’ impetuosity,
Despite my fear
Of agony and ecstasy.
And so my life is bound,
Conclusively,
To Agony!. To Ecstasy!.
And though my wound
Is permanently raw
I bear that sore
Without undue despondency
In my profound
Wild agony!, high ecstasy!.
